We all take pride in something we’ve done or accomplished. It is these accomplishments that strengthen our self-esteem and our confidence that we are worth something. When we achieve something, we feel good and want to do more and become more. It can be seen even in very young children.
For instance, a little girl learns to use the spoon and fork when eating and when she knows how proud her mother is upon learning this, the child continues to use her spoon and fork. She also seeks new things to learn that are more challenging than what she can already do, such as pouring water into her glass or putting her toys back in the cupboard. In short, these accomplishments drive individuals to achieve more and make them feel good.
It is important to acknowledge your goals and your sense of accomplishment, not to compare to others’ goals and accomplishments. Second, there is a wonderful positive psychology concept called “to savour”, or as my mother would say “to relish in the moment”. The goals we create in life do not necessarily have to be long term or have an astronomical bar height.
Goals as set by self can be captured moments to fulfill an inner aspiration to attempt something that provides a connective piece to accomplishment. Goals attained, whether large or small feed into a belief in oneself, internal motivation, efficacy and even resilience. The second part of this is the conscious way in which we grab hold of that moment, and like a three-dimensional piece of art, we see it, we feel it, and we appreciate it. Fred Bryant and Joseph Veroff (2007) describe savouring as the ability to notice and appreciate experiences, events, feelings; simply the good in one’s life. There are many times we experience good or memorable events, but we lack the consideration to lock them into the vault of great things we can re-experience over and over again. The challenge is the conscious attention to the experience of pleasure. The same applies for when we spend time with our children. How often do we actually relish in the moments we have with them – those moments we force ourselves to forget about the lunch boxes that require packing or the dinner that has to be prepared?
This month…challenge yourself to INDULGE! Get giddy, get happy, have fun, set to your own bar; enjoy the moment and what it provides for you and indulge yourself in the moment. Stop. Pause, become aware and SAVOUR every moment!