It seems parents are more afraid of having their kids stuck at home with them 24/7 for the next few weeks than they are of the actual pandemic. Not only is there no school, but we’ve also been asked to practice “social distancing” (no playdates, outings, parks, public places, etc.), which is making you wonder if you will end up killing your kids before the coronavirus even gets a chance to come near them…
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Seven years ago, I went in early for an emergency scan. I knew I was pregnant but had strong stabbing pains that made me think it may be an ectopic pregnancy. Turns out it was just my round ligaments taking immense strain at the degree of stretching needed to make space for TWO babies. Twins…TWINS??? My mother is a twin and we have a few sets of triplets in the family too, but I was quite happy in my bubble of “it won’t happen to me”.
Fast forward 7 years and my precious gifts are now 6 and a half. Almost daily I thank God for choosing me to be their mother. But I’ve got to say, I am so very thankful that I was a trained and experienced Parenting Coach (with a background as an Occupational Therapist in paediatrics) before they were born. Otherwise, I may not be loving it half as much as I have been. Having 2 premature newborns, 2 crawling babies, 2 mischievous toddlers etc comes with its challenges, especially when there is an older singleton sibling in the mix. But with some very useful practical parenting tools on my belt, I’ve been absolutely loving it! And today, I would like to share some of what I have learned about these precious creatures.
I don’t know about you, but I feel like the sound of moaning and whining tends to have a direct line to triggering my “reptilian brain”. It’s hard to be rational when a tiny human is making the hairs at the back of your neck stand on end. So, why do they do this? And what can we as parents do about it?
Let’s start with the why. You see, as babies, the only way that our children could communicate that they would like anything to be different to the way it was (hunger, boredom, poo nappy etc) was by moaning or crying. So, once they become toddlers, unless we teach them a better way to communicate, they will continue to use what has always worked.
‘Tantrums come in various forms, depending on the child’s age, their temperament and the consistency in boundaries within your home,’ explains parenting coach and occupational therapist Celeste Rushby of munchkins.me, a collective of coaches who empower parents to help transform family dynamics for the better. She says that, despite all prospective parents dreading the ‘terrible twos’, tantrums actually begin at between 10 and 18 months.
I was 32 weeks pregnant and everything was going smoothly. I just loved being pregnant. As usual I woke up at 3am to go to the loo. I noticed that my underwear was a bit wet, but in my half asleep state I just cursed the incontinence that I had been warned may come with pregnancy. After all, I had been doing my Kegels religiously!